Stabbin and I just informed Kevin of our resignation.
Stabbin and I have talked it over, and we have both been in conflict about the project. Mood swings and often wondering why we are doing this. We have come to the conclusion that it is best if we lay down our positions now before all our permissions have been set for nothing. There are quite a number of reasons as to why we wanted to do this, and at the same time also do not. We could elaborate on all of them, but there are quite many and it is hard to pin down something solid. Let me assure you that our permissions were not the issue, though; we know that Kevin were well on your way to giving them to us. We did this because we do like the community still and would like to provide people with a fun place to be. On the other hand, there have been many doubts about it, and especially all those people leaving anyways even after demands were being fulfilled was just very demotivating.
People had varying responses to me doing this. Some appreciated it, such as Joe or PandaASDF, and quite many others. Others judged it negatively, such as inu or Noodl. Regarding the latter, though, earlier this evening I realised that I don’t have to give a damn. I don’t have to answer to any of these people. The only person I have to answer to is myself, and myself alone. So then the question really became “Do I want this?”. And the internal conflict I have been feeling about it ever since it began should be the answer. This is not a good idea. It’s still hard to explain, I tried to do it a little bit here but I don’t want to attempt to elaborate on it too much because, as I said earlier, it is complicated and hard to pin down.
We feel really guilty about it because, even though we did clearly say that it might come to this, we did make a promise that we cannot uphold. So we’re sorry, but we have to step down.
A sincere apology to the community. We did state that it might come to this, but it probably still comes as a surprise to those who got their hopes up. A more personal apology I have for Madact. You said that you were fine with the Senior rank being removed as long as we would manage to fill in the role you guys fulfilled. Now I only removed the rank but did not get to do something apart from devise a new method of handling apps.
Apart from that, I am not sure what else I have to say. I really enjoyed administrating the servers again the past two days. I genuinely, literally think it made me a better person. It was good to be able to really be there for players again. But it would be weird to keep that rank, as I would still be expected to be involved in the community. And the main reason for leaving is that I am once again getting too involved and feeling pressured; even though I know in my mind that it doesn’t have to be that hard. Like, I always felt this big responsibility for the community and that really came up again this time. And with Stabbin by my side I thought this had a shot. But apparently I am still not comfortable with doing this.
To inu, if Clockwork is still happening I would probably still be up for keeping my position there. It’s hard to explain why Clockwork is different, seeing as how I’ve been saying that the demands were not the problem, but my own feelings were. But anyways, just putting that up here.
This thread was probably pretty incoherent, it was hard to keep my concentration while writing it and I honestly cannot be bothered proofreading it all ¯\/(^_^)\/¯
Anyways, I once again apologise to everyone. Should there be any questions, you can contact me in Steam.
Yours sincerely,
Evo, and on behalf of Stabbin and well
Stabbin and I have talked it over, and we have both been in conflict about the project. Mood swings and often wondering why we are doing this. We have come to the conclusion that it is best if we lay down our positions now before all our permissions have been set for nothing. There are quite a number of reasons as to why we wanted to do this, and at the same time also do not. We could elaborate on all of them, but there are quite many and it is hard to pin down something solid. Let me assure you that our permissions were not the issue, though; we know that Kevin were well on your way to giving them to us. We did this because we do like the community still and would like to provide people with a fun place to be. On the other hand, there have been many doubts about it, and especially all those people leaving anyways even after demands were being fulfilled was just very demotivating.
People had varying responses to me doing this. Some appreciated it, such as Joe or PandaASDF, and quite many others. Others judged it negatively, such as inu or Noodl. Regarding the latter, though, earlier this evening I realised that I don’t have to give a damn. I don’t have to answer to any of these people. The only person I have to answer to is myself, and myself alone. So then the question really became “Do I want this?”. And the internal conflict I have been feeling about it ever since it began should be the answer. This is not a good idea. It’s still hard to explain, I tried to do it a little bit here but I don’t want to attempt to elaborate on it too much because, as I said earlier, it is complicated and hard to pin down.
We feel really guilty about it because, even though we did clearly say that it might come to this, we did make a promise that we cannot uphold. So we’re sorry, but we have to step down.
A sincere apology to the community. We did state that it might come to this, but it probably still comes as a surprise to those who got their hopes up. A more personal apology I have for Madact. You said that you were fine with the Senior rank being removed as long as we would manage to fill in the role you guys fulfilled. Now I only removed the rank but did not get to do something apart from devise a new method of handling apps.
Apart from that, I am not sure what else I have to say. I really enjoyed administrating the servers again the past two days. I genuinely, literally think it made me a better person. It was good to be able to really be there for players again. But it would be weird to keep that rank, as I would still be expected to be involved in the community. And the main reason for leaving is that I am once again getting too involved and feeling pressured; even though I know in my mind that it doesn’t have to be that hard. Like, I always felt this big responsibility for the community and that really came up again this time. And with Stabbin by my side I thought this had a shot. But apparently I am still not comfortable with doing this.
To inu, if Clockwork is still happening I would probably still be up for keeping my position there. It’s hard to explain why Clockwork is different, seeing as how I’ve been saying that the demands were not the problem, but my own feelings were. But anyways, just putting that up here.
This thread was probably pretty incoherent, it was hard to keep my concentration while writing it and I honestly cannot be bothered proofreading it all ¯\/(^_^)\/¯
Anyways, I once again apologise to everyone. Should there be any questions, you can contact me in Steam.
Yours sincerely,
Evo, and on behalf of Stabbin and well
Or at least on steam or mumble now and then 
