- Joined
- Sep 16, 2018
- Messages
- 1,478
Yes yes yes, clip bait. Okay I’ll stop posting +1 offtopic thread from now on. Anyways just here to primarily just rant to myself just for a bit.
I feel like I have admin syndrome sometimes, whether it be on NY Trade, EU Trade, or whatever server.
Anyways all that aside, I want to just talk to myself in offtopic as weird as that sounds. I’m currently attempting to build hours up again and apply to be a trial but some days I just lose the motivation to stay on the server that I can only hold a 15 minute to 30 minute connection time even on my days off of working ( my work schedule so far is 4 days of working 10 hours and the having 4 days off). I want to be a trial again possibly, but I’m thinking of the future as far as that seem. I have a 2 year contract for shore duty and eventually I’ll be put into sea duty where I could go on deployments for months on end and I don’t really know how admin activity is looked upon ( I mean I know since I kind of got to experience being an admin and all, but honestly how long does it take to “take a break from Tf2/gaming”/ go on vacation, or focus other things”). Even now, I still worry sometimes that my “friend” on my friend list are just my pity friend since they remember me from back when.
I’m not taking away from real life that should be everyone’s primarily focus firsthand ( anyone really close to me know the mental issues I deal with). That for me that was just my excuse and I didn’t feel like I was worthy enough to be an admin since I was even going to be inactive for 2 months going to bootcamp ( ended up being 3 months since yeah Corona virus) and I felt like I’d be taking up a slot for another prospecting person that wanted to apply ( NY Trade was full at the time). I want to try, but honestly I probably won’t be active as much as I use to be ( maybe I can focus more time on my days off, but I want to spend my time with my friends on base and shore duty before I go to sea).
Side Note: Sorry I was one and off again for most of this year, I kind of silently cancelled the Christmas giveaway since I’m going to be away and surprise visit my family and want to treat them out for all the time I’ve missed with them. I hope your Christmas even though like 2 months away goes well and if you finish reading this that your day is going well. If not remember tomorrow is always another day, I cry myself to sleep sometimes but I wake up look forward for the next day. This is Chae signing off offtopic for a bit.
(Also feet pics xd)
I feel like I have admin syndrome sometimes, whether it be on NY Trade, EU Trade, or whatever server.
Anyways all that aside, I want to just talk to myself in offtopic as weird as that sounds. I’m currently attempting to build hours up again and apply to be a trial but some days I just lose the motivation to stay on the server that I can only hold a 15 minute to 30 minute connection time even on my days off of working ( my work schedule so far is 4 days of working 10 hours and the having 4 days off). I want to be a trial again possibly, but I’m thinking of the future as far as that seem. I have a 2 year contract for shore duty and eventually I’ll be put into sea duty where I could go on deployments for months on end and I don’t really know how admin activity is looked upon ( I mean I know since I kind of got to experience being an admin and all, but honestly how long does it take to “take a break from Tf2/gaming”/ go on vacation, or focus other things”). Even now, I still worry sometimes that my “friend” on my friend list are just my pity friend since they remember me from back when.
I’m not taking away from real life that should be everyone’s primarily focus firsthand ( anyone really close to me know the mental issues I deal with). That for me that was just my excuse and I didn’t feel like I was worthy enough to be an admin since I was even going to be inactive for 2 months going to bootcamp ( ended up being 3 months since yeah Corona virus) and I felt like I’d be taking up a slot for another prospecting person that wanted to apply ( NY Trade was full at the time). I want to try, but honestly I probably won’t be active as much as I use to be ( maybe I can focus more time on my days off, but I want to spend my time with my friends on base and shore duty before I go to sea).
Side Note: Sorry I was one and off again for most of this year, I kind of silently cancelled the Christmas giveaway since I’m going to be away and surprise visit my family and want to treat them out for all the time I’ve missed with them. I hope your Christmas even though like 2 months away goes well and if you finish reading this that your day is going well. If not remember tomorrow is always another day, I cry myself to sleep sometimes but I wake up look forward for the next day. This is Chae signing off offtopic for a bit.
(Also feet pics xd)